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Postedabout 1 month ago
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Don't feel you have to add anything more, but if you have advice not covered in the article, I would love to hear what you have to say.
Putting that aside, I highly recommend the book "To Sell Is Human" that reframes "sales" as something more, i.e. convincing a child they need to brush their teeth before bed is also "sales"
It was one of the books that helped me through this, The Challenger Sale if you want to read something more akin to traditional sales.
Another avenue you should consider is getting a professional resume / career coach. A good one will ask you questions about what you want in a job before looking at what you've written. They bring experience and have seen 1000s of resumes to know what works, and are tuned into how that changes over time.
> But I just. Can't. Get. Moving.
Another book recommendation, "The Now Habit"
books are going to be much better than what you read online
1. they get you away from the portal to that anxiety
2. they are long, thorough, well thought out, with many examples/anecdotes for you to potentially connect the dots through
> I highly recommend the book "To Sell Is Human" that reframes "sales" as something more, i.e. convincing a child they need to brush their teeth before bed is also "sales"
It sounds like there might be some overlap with my favourite book, Never Split the Difference (:s/sales/negotation). Quote:
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Life is negotiation. The majority of the interactions we have at work and at home are negotiations that boil down to the expression of a simple, animalistic urge: I want.
“I want you to free the hostages,” is a very relevant one to this book, of course. But so is:
“I want you to accept that $1 million contract.”
“I want to pay $20,000 for that car.”
“I want you to give me a 10 percent raise.” and
“I want you to go to sleep at 9 p.m.”
---
> Another book recommendation, "The Now Habit"
I've heard of this one, and tried a few systems. Right now I'm reading Getting Things Done, and I really like it so far. It emphasizes simplicity and developing a system you can trust so you have less running around wild in your brain.
I think my two big problems are:
1. Lack of writing experience generally; and
2. It's hard to explain, but I'm very much stuck in my own head. I do put myself out there, in personal life and professionally, but I tend to have this sickly feeling that grows until I delete my public profiles (professionally) and let most relationships go (personally). I guess I'm "Prone to isolation". This is a big problem in life, but I know I can't just easily solve it, I need to solve it by taking action in my life, like trying to work in my field. I can't wait until I'm perfect to start living and taking action, it's the action itself that will change things. But emotionally, I'm so twisted up that it's hard to get anywhere at all.
I've actually never finished TNH because I'm back to doing things and having fun
As I type this out, it’s cathartic. I also know the work that needs to be done, can do it precisely and expertly, with sales/productivity knowledge in pocket; but, I’m still can’t get myself to start. I know it’s important.
The reality is that I’m afraid. Fearful it won’t work out. That I’ll get a “no” again. After pouring my heart and soul into something only to be rejected leaves some scar tissue. Or, I could put in one tenth of the effort because I think it’s hopeless. So the easier route for me is not thinking about it, and replying to a stranger on the internet.
That’s self-sabotage: unproductive, and hurtful and it fuels this cycle of self-hate. Instead, I’m trying to be more kind to myself and give myself the grace of that of a friend.
For one, it’s comforting that I’m in good company. Marcus Aurelius, the emperor of Rome, had this problem a thousand years ago.
“If you do the job in a principled way, with diligence, energy, and patience, if you keep yourself free from distractions, and keep the spirit inside you undamaged, as if you might have to give it back and any moment—
If you can embrace this without fear or expectation—can find fulfillment in what you’re doing now, as Nature intended, and in superhuman truthfulness—then your life will be happy. No one can prevent that.” - Meditations, Book 3
Why would he write this, if not to remind himself?
Good luck
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